Zombie Research Institute








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These are obvious signs I look for when zombiespotting -  not a rundown of symptoms.    See the  Metabolic and Mood disorders for that.



Gluten related


Small stature

Short stature is strongly correlated to gluten intolerance.   I believe it is more common among people with two gluten intolerance genes though.

  • Women who are gluten intolerant have smaller birthweight babies.   

  • Gluten intolerance in children results in an altered growth pattern.  Orexin stimulates the pituitary-adrenal system and stimulates production of  human growth hormone.  Low orexin causes low levels of HGH and inhibits growth of the long bones and mandible.  This results in disproportionately short legs, smaller hands and feet, and sometimes receding chins (the mandible is also affected by testosterone so this varies).   I suspect ear tube problems in children may be a manifestation of improper mandible growth.


Insulin Resistance

Overweight, red-faced, puffy.




Herpes Related:


Swollen noses, puffy eyes, saggy faces.


The trigeminal nerve is the earliest home of HSVI.   

One of the most prominent ways it displays is as swollen areas on the sides of the nose.

This is where the tear ducts pass through, and once it is obstructed the tear glands in the upper eyelids start to fill up and get puffy too.   It's a sensory nerve, so causes pain and a lower threshold for crying.


After a while the 7th cranial nerve is also affected.  This is a motor nerve which controls the muscles of the face.  The impairment results in sagging eyelids and cheeks.    The acute form of this is facial paralysis such as Bell's Palsy.    I am talking about partial impairment, a condition called pareisis.  It is common among Parkinson's patients, but is called a "Parkinson's mask".  


I did not get cold sores until I was 25, although I was clearly infected long before then.

I did have internal mouth lesions in junior high.  Men seem to report more internal mouth sores too...



Bad teeth

Gluten intolerance is associated with striations on the enamel.  

Herpes also causes enamel problems. 

Smaller mandibles cause tooth crowding. 

Strep causes cavities and periodontal disease.






Nicotine use is almost certainly a sign of orexin deficiency.  


English/Irish Heritage

Northern europeans have higher incidence of gluten intolerance in general, but I suspect that almost all Irish people have it, and am pretty sure all English people are zombies.  I think theres a simple medical explanation for the bad skin, bad teeth and stiff upper lips... and afternoon tea-time is a really big clue...      (well, I was close, anyway.)


Psych Professionals

If you are a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist or play one on TV-  proceed directly to detox-  do not pass Go, do not collect $200.   You are a brain eating zombie and quite dangerous. When you've recovered, please reassess the root cause of your behavior, the meaning of your dreams, and the fundamental assumptions of your profession.  Then make the appropriate amends. 




 Big Fat Disclaimer:  The research on this website has not been peer reviewed in any way.   The conclusions presented are strictly the opinion of the author.  It is being self-published as a public service in consideration for sufferers and as a stimulus to the medical research community.  Information presented on this page may be freely distributed or copied. 

Appropriate credit is requested.

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